I
never thought what it would be like to be away from them, I surely never
did; and I'm ashamed to be speaking it out like this--how it can squeeze
and squeeze a man, how it can prey on your mind, when you're nervous
like I am. 'Tis not everyone that cares for his home--there's lots o'
them never wants to see their wives again. But for me 'tis like being
shut up in a cage, it is!" Mr. Bosengate saw daylight between the skinny
fingers of the man's hand thrown out with a jerk. "I cannot bear it shut
up away from wife and home like what you are in the army. So when I took
my razor that morning I was wild--an' I wouldn't be here now but for
that man catching my hand. There was no reason in it, I'm willing to
confess. It was foolish; but wait till you get feeling like what I
was, and see how it draws you. Misters the jury, don't send me back to
prison; it is worse still there. If you have wives you will know what it
is like for lots of us; only some is more nervous than others. I swear
to you, sirs, I could not help it---?" Again the little man flung out
his hand, his whole thin body shook and Mr. Bosengate felt the same
sensation as when he drove his car over a dog--"Misters the jury, I hope
you may never in your lives feel as I've been feeling.
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