When tidings came of the abandonment of
the Danevirke my enthusiasm cooled; it was as though I foresaw how
little prospect of success there was. Still, I was less melancholy than
Lange at the thought of going to the war. I was single, and delighted at
the thought of going straight from the examination-table into a camp
life, and from a book-mad student to become a lieutenant. I was
influenced most by the prospect of seeing Lange every day at the
Officers' School, and on the field. But my comrades explained to me that
even if Lange and I came out of the School at the same time, it did not
follow that we should be in the same division, and that the thing,
moreover, that was wanted in an officer, was entire self-dependence.
They also pointed out to me the improbability of my being able to do the
least good, or having the slightest likelihood in front of me of doing
anything but quickly find myself in hospital. I did not really think
myself that I should be able to stand the fatigue, as the pupils of the
military academy went over to the army with an equipment that I could
scarcely have carried. I could not possibly suppose that the
conscription would select me as a private, on account of my fragile
build; but like all the rest, I was expecting every day a general
ordering out of the fit men of my age.
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