The philosophical Pantheism I was absorbed by, itself
worked counter to the idea of individualism inherent in me, taught me
and presented to me the union of all beings in Nature the All-Divine.
But it was not from Pantheism that the crisis of my spiritual life
proceeded; it was from the fountains of emotion which now shot up and
filled my soul with their steady flow. A love for humanity came over me,
and watered and fertilised the fields of my inner world which had been
lying fallow, and this love of humanity vented itself in a vast
compassion.
This gradually absorbed me till I could hardly bear the thought of the
suffering, the poor, the oppressed, the victims of Injustice. I always
saw them in my mind's eye, and it seemed to be my duty to work for them,
and to be disgraceful of me to enjoy the good things of life while so
many were being starved and tortured. Often as I walked along the
streets at night I brooded over these ideas till I knew nothing of what
was passing around me, but only felt how all the forces of my brain drew
me towards those who suffered.
There were warm-hearted and benevolent men among my near relatives. The
man whom my mother's younger sister had married had his heart in the
right place, so much indeed that he no sooner saw or heard of distress
than his hand was in his pocket, although he had little from which to
give.
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