When at last one evening the most round-backed of all of them, a
swain whose blond mustache, of irregular growth, resembled an old, worn-
out toothbrush more than anything else, also confided in me that he did
not know how it was, or what could really be the cause of it, but there
must be something about him, etc.,--then my belief in Vilsing's
singularity and my admiration for him broke down. It must not be
supposed that Vilsing regarded himself as a sensual fiend. He did not
pose as cold and impudent, but as heartfelt and instinct with feeling.
He was studying theology, and cherished no dearer wish than eventually
to become a priest. He constantly alternated between contrition and
self-satisfaction, arrogance and repentance, enjoyed the consciousness
of being exceptionally clever, an irresistible charmer, and a true
Christian. It seemed to him that, in the freshman whom he had singled
out from the crowd and given a place at his side, he had found an
intellectual equal, or even superior, and this attracted him; he met
with in me an inexperience and unworldliness so great that the
inferiority in ability which he declared he perceived was more than
counterbalanced by the superiority he himself had the advantage of, both
in social accomplishments and in dealing with women.
It thus seemed as though many of the essential conditions of a tolerably
permanent union between us were present.
Pages:
99
100
101
102
103
104
105
106
107
108
109
110
111
112
113
114
115
116
117
118
119
120
121
122
123